a willing heart

Salter Hill Church, Jamaica, July 2008

Last Saturday it hit me. In exactly one week I would be in the beautiful country of Colombia, serving God and the people there with the awesome JoyFM mission team. I had been planning, preparing, praying about this trip for over 6 months. I couldn’t believe that “the big day” was almost here. But after being on vacation for two weeks, then rushing home to get caught up with the life I put on hold for a bit, I guess it’s not that surprising that this trip kind of snuck up on me.

I am incredibly excited about this mission, don’t get me wrong. But the past few days I have been struggling with feelings of unpreparedness. I don’t think I felt this way before my trip to Jamaica, but I can’t remember for sure. The current state of my suitcase is a pretty good representation of how I’m feeling. There are some jeans and t-shirts folded neatly inside, a pair of tennis shoes and some socks, a swimming suit, a hand towel, craft supplies, and bug spray. That’s it. No, that's not everything I'm taking...it's just everything I have packed. My church clothes have yet to be ironed. I’m still searching for some capris. My trip guide is open on my bed. The shopping list I’ve started (which will hopefully get done ASAP, since I’m leaving in 5 days!) is already overwhelming. Four years worth of Spanish notes from high school are nowhere to be found, even though I was planning on using them to brush up on my foreign language skills. I’m still trying to put together Bible songs sung in Spanish simultaneously with hand gestures and homemade percussion instruments.

It seems like there’s so much I have yet to do. I’m not really stressed, and not anxious, I just don’t feel ready. And that kind of scares me. So tonight I put myself in time-out and pulled out my Bible, which I’m ashamed to admit has fallen by the wayside the past two weeks. I started reading 2 Corinthians 8.

“And now, brothers and sisters, we want you to know about the grace God gave the churches in Macedonia. They have been tested by great troubles, and they are very poor. But they gave much because of their great joy. I can tell you that they gave as much as they were able and even more than they could afford. No one told them to do it. But they begged and pleaded with us to let them share in this service for God’s people. And they gave in a way we did not expect. They first gave themselves to the Lord and to us. This is what God wants.”

These few simple verses spoke to my heart. Any other day, this particular passage might not have struck me. But today, these words were exactly what I needed to hear. They reminded me what the essence of this mission is. Maybe Saturday will get here and I still won’t be ready. Maybe I won’t be able to speak Spanish fluently. Our mission team might have trouble adapting to a new country and culture. And I might feel like I don’t have a lot to offer compared to others on the team.

This Scripture tells me that these things don’t matter. The Macedonians were remarkable and stood out to Paul because of their willingness to serve and their love for the Lord. God has shown me that His plan for me, this summer, is Colombia. So instead of focusing on what I haven’t yet accomplished, I am going to focus on what God is going to accomplish on this trip. God never asked me to be extraordinary; he simply asked me to be willing. To trust in His plan. To go to Colombia with a kind heart and open arms. To offer everything I have; my time, my hands, my talents. My mission is to give. To love. To serve.

So if you’re reading this, please keep myself and the JoyFM mission team in your prayers! We need prayers for our safety, good health, and that God will use us to change lives in Colombia…and that our lives may be forever changed as well. If I have internet access, I might post some blogs on the trip...and if not, I'll post some prayer journal entries when I get back. Adios, amigos! Voy a Colombia!

From Jess, with love <3

always